Time To Let Go
by Tuathail
Summary: A different take on the usual Alanna-dies-George-cries. Angst, but in a different way. The importance of moving on, of letting go. [One-shot]


**Get over it**

**Summary**: A different take on the usual "Alanna dies George cries". Angst, but in a totally different way. It starts the same as usual, but it does get different.

Yes, I will update my other fics! I swear! I just really had to write this.

**For Queen's Own, Alanna the Lioness, and Huntress Diana. You guys made me cry so much tonight that I had to write this. For Jen, each and every ficlet, whether I say so or not.**

**)O(**

The goblet dropped from his hand.

"I'm sorry, George." Jon's voice was just as pained. Just as anguished.

He didn't hear it. He didn't see the other man's concerned face. He didn't see anything, but memories. Years of memories, rushing back.

_George, I'm so sorry. I wouldn't have left, given half a chance. I never wanted to leave you. I love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anything in this life, and I miss you more than I'll ever miss anything._

Jon looked down at the too-prone body of the redhead. The short, stocky redhead. His friend. His companion. His Champion.

_Jon, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving. I feel like I'm cheating somehow, or taking the easy way out. But I'm so tired, and this is a needed break for me. I know you'd understand._

Her eyes flooded with tears. Drops of her soul spilt out of half-closed eyes to blotch the piece of paper she held until it was illegible. The news was impossible to bear. Thousands of miles away, her twin felt her pain as well as his own.

_Aly, I'm sorry. Thom, Alan, I'm sorry. I love you all. I'm sorry for never being there, and now, never being able to be there again._

He couldn't bring himself to do anything for days. Weeks. He cried, drank, cried, and drank some more. If ever he did leave his room, it was to stand on a veranda and remember.

_George, don't lose yourself. If you love me, then stop mourning me. Life still needs to be lived._

He kept up a brave face, most of the time. Only Thayet saw him weeping almost every night. Only Thayet saw him hesitate to appoint a new Champion.

_Jon, stop it. If you really miss me, then pick yourself back up. Be the king you were born to be. If you want to do something for me, then stop crying and be strong for me._

She was worrying everyone with her quietness, her meek responses, her gentle, inhuman obedience. Her queen fretted over her, knowing it was helpless. Her darkings stayed with her all the time, trying to comfort her. It did no good.

_Aly, you were always so much braver and smarter than I'd ever been. Can't you understand that I need to rest, too? Can't you understand that even a Lioness needs to sleep? Or are you just too reluctant to accept it?_

He knelt at her grave, eyes rimmed with red due to long weeping. "I can't live without you, love." From far above, she saw the knife he held. She knew what he was about to do. Unheard to human ears, she screeched her pain, her fury.

_George, you have to get over it. You have to let go. I need my rest. I've done all I could in this life, lived everything to the fullest, and now, I'm gone. You'll never change that, George, and I don't want you to. Don't try to join me. Please. I've lived my life, and now you need to keep going with yours._

A few months later, King Jonathan decreed a statue of a Lioness be made and put up in one of the palace courtyards. Nobody dared try to argue, not even Thayet.

_Goddess, Jon, this is ridiculous. I don't need to be remembered, I just need to sleep. Is that too much to ask? I don't need anything done in my honor. I just need for everyone to let go._

He should be focusing on his enemies. He knew that. But his mind couldn't help wandering over to his mother.

She was letting down her queen, her friends. She knew that. But she just couldn't get back up. Couldn't keep going.

_Children, I love you all. Always have, always will. But you're still young, and you've still lives to be lived. Aly, you've always been about fun. Well, I agree with you this time. You need to have fun. You need to live. Don't let my death deprive you of life._

_Please, everyone, let go. Let me rest. I love you all, but I need you to let me go. Give me peace._

In a Barony known as Pirate's Swoop, a lonely lover mourns day and night. In a city called Corus, a deprived king grieves his Champion. In a palace of the Copper Isles, a daughter misses her mother.

In the sky above, between a shining star and a ball of emotion, a lady knight lingers, cursing her family and friends for their love. She cannot rest until they have let her go. And rest was the only thing she wanted.

Thus, she waits, and waits, and waits...

For years and lives and dreams and hearts.

_Lady Sir Alanna of Pirate's Swoop and Olau_

_The Lioness, King's Champion, Burning-Brightly One_

_Beloved Mother and wife_

_Devoted knight and friend_

_She saved us all_

_Rest in Peace_


End file.
